432 | Queerness and ADHD with Bex!

Join the ADHD reWired Team every second Tuesday of the month for our monthly Live Q&A!  Listen to this episode uninterrupted by ads when you become a Patron at $5.00 a month or more by going to adhdrewired.com/Patreon!  Questions & Topics in this Episode: [00:03:16] A listener asks about helping college students with rigid thinking and flexibility [00:10:40] “Time management, project management, time-blindness and distractions are weak spots in my daily work.  Where would you feel is the best place to try and put my efforts in preparation for a return to the office?”  [00:16:59] A listener who is starting their ADHD journey asks about being self-employed and getting themselves to work.   [00:29:48] “I would like to hear from the panel about how adults with ADHD can manage/heal the grief and trauma associated with the lifelong losses incurred by the previously unmanaged condition.”  [00:38:42] What are some ideas to make kitchen cleaning more fun and exciting? [00:49:52] Differential diagnosis for adults: Are there mental health or neurological conditions/combinations of conditions that causes an adult to display the entire range of EF (executive function) challenges in adults?  How can impaired adults advocate for a diagnosis and get support in the case nobody in their life noticed symptoms in their childhood?  [00:55:17] “What are the helpful visual cues to help keep track of time?” [01:01:24] A moment of dad & plenty of laughs Resources & Honorable Mentions: Time Timer   Time Tracker® Mini   App (iOS): It’s Almost Time for iOS    Check out the Other Podcasts on the ADHD reWired Podcast Network: with Brendan Mahan with Will Curb with MJ Siemens  

In this episode, I talk about the 4 stages that we go through once we realize we have ADHD.  These 4 stages are there for a reason to help us ease into our next phase of transformation.  Be it moving past a diagnosis, changing jobs, end a relationship, or starting a new business.  
Stage one – Being a victim to the change
Stage two – Healing the wounds 
Stage three – Making a game plan 
Stage four – Playing the game

Book a complimentary session with me at readysetchoose.com to explore how to move past these stages, mention this episode in your application. 

Join the ADHD reWired Team every second Tuesday of the month for our monthly Live Q&A by going to adhdrewired.com/Events Get the full uninterrupted version of this episode when you become a Patron at $5.00 a month or more by going to adhdrewired.com/Patreon!  Questions/Topics:  [00:01:07] Welcome & introductions. [00:02:48] Hello to our special guest panelist. [00:03:25] A listener asks about laziness and ADHD: “Does laziness exist?” [00:13:22] The Sleep With Me Podcast has over 1000 episodes. Eric asks Scoots if he ever gets bored from doing the same thing over and over again. [00:16:19] “What are some ways that you trick yourselves into getting up in the morning when the prospect of life is overwhelming?”  [00:28:00] “After finally finding the right medication (for ADHD), what is the next step? Self-help books, podcasts, and routines are great but don’t stick long enough. Coaching options?”  [00:29:31] A listener shares feeling shame around their ADHD diagnosis, then asks the panelists for tips on accepting and loving oneself with it.   [00:32:03] Scoots has a mix of working in coworking spaces and from home but has been experiencing back pain from working on the couch.  Then, he asks about options for changing scenery.   [00:40:34] “Just lost three months to a game. Deleted the game – how do I start to get back on track?”  [00:47:54] A listener asks Scoots, “How did you come up with the ‘Sleep With Me Podcast’ style you use? Was it a default process or were you intentionally embracing and capitalizing on the pointless meandering train-of-thought?  [00:52:59] “One of my main problems is paralysis when I start to feel overwhelmed.  I have so much to do that I can’t decide what to work on so I do nothing.  How can I calm that feeling without ignoring all the things I’m behind on?”  [00:58:57] A question related to the national medication shortage.   [01:01:17] Scoots does an on-the-fly Sleep-With-Me-style summary of today’s episode [01:04:47] A moment of dad…    Resources & Honorable Mentions: Sleep With Me Podcast   App: Wake N Shake Alarm Clock 4+ ( only)  Alarm on Wheels   Book: The One Thing   Check out the Other Podcasts on the ADHD reWired Podcast Network: ADHD Essentials with Brendan Mahan Hacking Your ADHD with Will Curb ADHD Diversified with MJ Siemens Have you heard about our Adult Study Hall Community? Go to adultstudyhall.com to join our ADHD-friendly body-doubling community! Interested in group coaching and want to take your ADHD management to the next level? Go to coachingrewired.com to get all the up-to-date information on the upcoming season of ADHD reWired’s award-winning Coaching & Accountability groups!  

In today’s show, Caroleen Verly joins Eric on the podcast!  Caroleen is a former data analyst turned business owner and financial coach who loves spreadsheets, numbers, problem solving, and data!  She also loves working with clients to find order in the chaos of their financial lives.  Caroleen has a degree in economics from Yale and spent the first 12 years of her career doing data analysis and data visualization.  In addition to her business, Caroleen is also a mom to three young children!  Check out Caroleen’s website UntangleYourMoney.com Learn more about Caroleen at her website Find UntangleYourMoney on Instagram at @adhdmoney Questions/Topics:  [00:01:10] Introducing Caroleen!  [00:02:26] What does it mean to create good systems that work by default?  [00:03:55] A discussion on automation, bills, payments, resistance, and safety nets [00:07:32] Dedicating accounts, savings, and putting money in the right spots for different purposes [00:16:57] Banking and ADHD-friendly interfaces  [00:18:37] Caroleen tries the Qube Money app [00:21:30] A discussion about credit cards and managing them successfully  [00:25:02] Impulsive spending and the impact of credit scores  [00:27:57] “The cheaper option is not always cheaper!” [00:38:27] Ways to start saving in the midst of debt and living paycheck to paycheck  [00:41:30] Cutting costs vs. making more money: Which one is better?   [00:45:56] Resources & closing thoughts Resources & Honorable Mentions: Book (and Editor’s choice!):  I Will Teach You to be Rich by Ramit Sethi Website:  I Will Teach You to be Rich at IWillTeachYouToBeRich.com 🌟 Have you heard about our Adult Study Hall Community? Go to adultstudyhall.com to join our ADHD-friendly body-doubling community! 🌟 Interested in group coaching and want to take your ADHD management to the next level? Go to coachingrewired.com to get all the up-to-date information on the upcoming season of ADHD reWired’s award-winning Coaching & Accountability groups!

More Shownotes coming soon! In the meantime, get to know today’s guest a little more by going to his website at In this episode, Eric is joined by ADHD reWired Coaching Group Alumni, Alejandro Santiago.  Alejandro is a mindfulness life coach and yoga instructor who first experienced the benefits of mindfulness and breathwork when he was a student at Parsons School of Design in New York City. To cope with the stress of ADHD and university, he cultivated a practice of Pranayama, an ancient form of yogic breathwork. Today, he’s teaching people how to get out of their heads and into the breath by merging the Western practices of mindfulness based in self-compassion, and yogic Pranayama meditations. He studied compassionate inquiry with Dr. Gabor Maté, a therapeutic approach to uncover and heal trauma in our bodies. When he’s not teaching and coaching, he works as a portrait photographer in Toronto, Canada.

“Rather than be defined by a label, I choose to challenge the boundaries of its perceived limitations.” Shawn Smith

I had the pleasure of speaking with Shawn Smith, M.Ed., CCC about ADHD, ASD and his personal journey with it all, and how he supports his clients as a counselor/therapist. 

This conversion was such a delight, Shawn has an amazing way to capture your attention and get to the heart of the discussion. 

I enjoyed talking about

• ADHD and Medication, the long journey to finding treatment that supports ADHD, and how his own experience of medication
• He shares a unique approach to building confidence through creating challenges 
• Shawn was recently diagnosed with ASD in addition to his ADHD, he shares how this diagnosis shows up in his life 
• Navigating friendships as a neurodivergent thinker
• How to manage rigid thinking 
• I especially enjoyed his view on masking in social settings and setting boundaries  
• “no one said being awesome is going to be easy”, Shawn Smith.

More About Shawn

Neurodivergent (Autistic and ADHD) Psychotherapist, Consultant, and founder of Don’t dis-my-ability®, a multifaceted company that utilizes my unique gifts that come by way of being uniquely gifted and neurodivergent.

• Website: www.ddmacs.ca
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ddmacs.ca
• Twitter: https://twitter.com/dontdismyabilit
• YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/DdmacsCa
• Don’t dis-my-ability Podcast: http://ddmacs.ca/podcast/